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Life Lately: Volume 4 – This is Me

December 10, 2018 by Kelly Nash 10 Comments

When the sharpest words wanna cut me down
I’m gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out
I am brave, I am bruised
I am who I’m meant to be, this is me
Look out ’cause here I come
And I’m marching on to the beat I drum
I’m not scared to be seen
I make no apologies, this is me.

~The Greatest Showman, “This Is Me”

Taking the Plunge

It takes a lot to do something that’s out of the general norm and out of your comfort zone. And it also takes a lot to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. When you finally take the plunge, you’re bound to encounter criticism, jealousy, judgment or confusion from others.

Growing up, I learned the true meaning of that as I started writing and publishing my work. I mentioned it in this post, but I started various blogs and wrote notes on Facebook throughout high school and college. I loved to write and I was bursting with things I wanted to get off my chest. Unfortunately, after hitting ‘publish,’ I encountered many eye rolls and became the brunt of a lot of my friends’ jokes. I’m assuming they didn’t really get why I was doing what I was doing or didn’t care to understand. It hurt, but I didn’t let it stop me from continuing to write, because it was something I loved to do.

I knew starting Lipstick & Ink would probably subject me to the same reactions. It’s why I knew I had to create a professional blog for real – one that had its own domain and its own personality. I figured if I took it seriously as a brand and made it legit looking, people would take me seriously. I put my heart and soul into my website and learned how to work with CSS and JavaScript codes. I taught myself everything and created thelipstickandink.com entirely on my own.

Navigating Negativity & Insecurities

When I launched Lipstick & Ink this past February, I received so much positivity and encouragement. It signified to me that I had done something right this time around. Or maybe just enough time had passed for people to mature and recognize that this was me and writing was my passion. I so appreciate those people who offered their words of encouragement and who have stuck by me, believed in me, and pushed me throughout the last year. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

The reality though is that when you start a new venture, while you do get positive feedback and support (and surprisingly, from people you wouldn’t have expected), you also get the complete opposite. You unfortunately get people who ignore everything about it and act like that part of you doesn’t exist. You get people who unfollow you on social media for whatever reason. And you even get people who have harsh words to say that cut deep to your core. It’s been eye opening for me to see who is there to support me and who isn’t. 

The thing is, I know a lot of my family and friends don’t really get the whole blogging thing. I understand they probably just aren’t into blogs or care that much about them. But despite that, I would have thought I’d still have their support or they’d at least read Lipstick & Ink because it’s my blog. It’s made me question everything. What am I doing wrong? Why don’t the people I care about want to talk about this part of my life with me? Am I being annoying? Do they not like this part of me? Should I be writing about something else more relatable? Do they even care? It’s honestly enough to drive a girl completely mad. 

It had gotten to a point the last few months where I almost felt embarrassed or ashamed even talking about my blog. It made me feel like I needed to keep my blogger life separate from my personal life, which didn’t do me any favors because it’s one of the biggest parts of my life. And because I had all of these insecurities swirling around in my head, I sometimes would stop myself while writing and think, what will people think of me for writing this? or will this offend someone? or will anyone care about this? And then I’d go back and rewrite whatever I was writing until I got it to a point where I felt okay with it.

Not Changing Who I Am

I’ve let the insecurities consume me and I’ve shed tears over it. But once the tears were wiped and I allowed myself to be sad over it the last few months, I picked myself up last week and changed my attitude. I’ve realized I’m not going to change something because I’m afraid of what people will think. I’m not going to worry anymore about how people are going to react (or not react). I’m certainly not going to stop what I love because of the haters and the people in my life who don’t support me. And I’m definitely not going to change who I am.

If you too feel like you aren’t being fully supported or being seen, I see you. I feel what you are going through. Don’t let the negativity get to you. Use the haterade as fuel. Don’t change who you are to appease others. You are you for a reason and you are doing great. Keep pushing and keep achieving. Keep being you. Keep making your mark.

This is Me

I’m listening to The Greatest Showman’s song “This is Me” on repeat as I write this and it’s giving me so much life. This song in its entirety has spoken to me to just be me and stop worrying about what others think. I won’t be a people pleaser. I won’t sugarcoat things I’m writing about. I won’t tiptoe around the fact that I have a blog and that I’m excited about what I’m doing with it. I won’t make apologies for being who I am. If people don’t want to talk to about Lipstick & Ink or what I’ve been up to with it, that’s on them. If people don’t want to support me, that’s on them. If people are going to hate and punish me for doing what I love, that’s on them.

This blog is 100% me and I’m 100% proud of it. It may have started as a hobby, but in less than a year, it’s become much more than that. I am turning it into a side hustle and my plan is to eventually turn it into a business. What I’ve been able to accomplish already boggles my mind and I know it’s only the beginning.

“And I’m marching on to the beat I drum. I’m not scared to be seen. I make no apologies, THIS IS ME.” 

Pink lipstick stain

Kelly turns around as she smiles and walks on a Chicago bridge.

 

Kelly, Founder of Lipstick & Ink
Kelly Nash

Kelly Nash is a Chicago-based writer, speaker, career advisor, and founder of Lipstick & Ink®. In addition, she works full-time in technology as a Success Manager at Salesforce and has over 10 years of digital marketing experience. Kelly has been featured in Thrive Global, International Association of Women, General Assembly, Salesforce, SheFactor, and Six Degrees Society. She is also in the process of writing her first book.

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Filed Under: life lately, realtalk, thoughts Tagged With: life lately, personal thoughts, realtalk

About Kelly Nash

Kelly Nash is a Chicago-based writer, speaker, career advisor, and founder of Lipstick & Ink®. In addition, she works full-time in technology as a Success Manager at Salesforce and has over 10 years of digital marketing experience. Kelly has been featured in Thrive Global, International Association of Women, General Assembly, Salesforce, SheFactor, and Six Degrees Society. She is also in the process of writing her first book.

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Comments

  1. Kelli says

    December 10, 2018 at 10:40 am

    It’s discouraging to not have the support of important people in your life, but it’s great that you’re pushing on regardless! I recently started a blog also, and have definitely felt timid of what others might think. Thanks for being a positive inspiration!

    Reply
    • Kelly Nash says

      December 11, 2018 at 12:27 pm

      Thank you, Kelli! It’s definitely a common feeling amongst bloggers, I feel like. We just shouldn’t let what other people will think (or not think) affect us!

      Reply
  2. Tracy says

    December 10, 2018 at 12:08 pm

    Omg I totallly feel you on this one. I’ve doubted myself and questioned whether I should continue with my blog so many times over because I didn’t feel any support or encouragement from the people I thought would show it the most. BUT I haven’t given up and I’m so proud of you for also pushing through it. I’ve been following your blog since you launched it and you are doing amazing girl! Keep it up ❤️

    Reply
    • Kelly Nash says

      December 11, 2018 at 12:28 pm

      I’m so glad you can relate and that I’m not alone in this! It’s difficult to swallow that the people we care about most don’t necessarily support us or care about our blog efforts. I’m glad to hear you haven’t given up either and appreciate your support! Thank you so much for following along and reading! You’re the best!

      Reply
  3. Jess Ryan says

    December 10, 2018 at 1:14 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing! This is so relevant in the new blogger world and also just in life in general. Don’t give up! You will look back and be happy you didn’t (I’ve been telling myself this a lot lately too!)

    Reply
    • Kelly Nash says

      December 11, 2018 at 12:29 pm

      I had a hunch it would be relevant to other bloggers! Thank you for your encouragement and support – and also for reading! Appreciate it, Jess!

      Reply
  4. Amanda says

    December 10, 2018 at 4:45 pm

    Keep doing what you’re doing girl. It’s amazing and inspirational. Coming from our industry, it’s great to show that it’s fine and great to have a passion/hobby outside of our day to days. It takes work but is totally doable.

    Reply
    • Kelly Nash says

      December 11, 2018 at 12:29 pm

      Thanks so much, Amanda. I really appreciate your support and kind words, as well as reading what I have to say!

      Reply
  5. Meg says

    December 11, 2018 at 1:34 am

    Thank you so much for putting your heart on your sleeve and sharing this with us. This really, really resonates right down to my core. Keep doing what you’re doing because what matters is that you are helping people! Your strength overcoming this is so inspiring and I love that we can be on this journey together!
    PS the Greatest Showman is the best, it inspired one of my blog posts too. Love it!

    Reply
    • Kelly Nash says

      December 11, 2018 at 12:31 pm

      Ahh love it!! And you are so welcome! Thank you for reading and telling me it resonates! I love that we can be on this crazy journey together too, continuing to cheer each other on!

      Reply

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HI THERE!

Kelly, Founder of Lipstick & Ink

Welcome to Lipstick & Ink®, your home for everything career, wellness and #realtalk inspired. I’m Kelly, a Chicago-based advertising tech professional, career advisor, writer, speaker, events host, and goal getter.

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[𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝙱𝙻𝙾𝙶 𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚃] 𝘗𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘥. While certainly an overused term, it’s definitely not overrated. Personal branding is more important than ever as it helps you to 𝙗𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙙 𝙖 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙪𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙛𝙤𝙧, 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙨, 𝙞𝙣𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙫𝙖𝙡𝙪𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙣𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙮, 𝙖𝙙𝙫𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙧. Regardless if you work in the corporate world or consider yourself an entrepreneur (or both!), knowing and cultivating your personal brand is essential.
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Because here’s the thing – you already have a personal brand, whether you realize it or not. 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗮 𝗯𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗱. However, understanding the power of your brand can be difficult and requires self-awareness, intention, and action.
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If you’re unsure or curious about how to get started with building and boosting your brand, I've developed a 5 step formula to do just that! You can read more about these 5 steps and your best path forward in L&I's newest blog post, found via the link in my bio!💋
3 years ago today, I pressed “Publish” on Lips 3 years ago today, I pressed “Publish” on Lipstick & Ink. Even though it was only a blog at the time, I was terrified to put myself out there. I worried about what people would think about me, wondered if my site was good enough, and questioned if what I was writing would even resonate or help others.
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At the same time, it was exhilarating and freeing. I was finally writing again, something that had been a passion of mine since I was a kid. I was in my purpose, sharing my knowledge of how I had grown my career and guiding women on how they could do the same. And most of all, I was pushing myself out of my comfort zone, facing fears I had avoided for years.
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Since February 22, 2018, I have grown more than I thought possible. From my blog to expanding to events to speaking to advising clients to writing my first book, I continue to find ways to grow L&I and make an impact. And I can feel in my bones this is only the beginning.

Through these last 3 years, if I could share one piece of advice as to what I’ve learned , it’s this: OWN YOUR POWER. Own the power of yours that’s generated from within, not outside of yourself. Your authentic power. Don’t give your power away. Don’t allow the thoughts of others to get in your way. Don’t compare yourself to others and wonder how you will measure up. Don’t hold back on what you want to do because you are concerned about how others are going to feel about it.
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There is always a choice to make in terms of whether you decide to own your power or give it away. And these days, I choose my power. I choose me. My hope is that you too honor who you are and choose yourself. Because when you choose yourself, you set yourself free💋
We live in a world of 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 We live in a world of 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 - and let's be honest, we have gotten reaaal accustomed to it. So much so, that we may be easily disappointed when something doesn't immediately go our way - including when it comes to our careers. Whether it's seeking a promotion or landing a job at your dream company, we need to remember that it may take longer than we like or anticipate.
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Most of the time, 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒔 𝒐𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒘𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒓 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒏 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒆𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒍𝒚. This is why it's critical to ᴘʟᴀɴᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴇᴇᴅ early on to begin preparing to reach your next career goal. For example:⠀
🌱 𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻: Start making an effort to connect with your manager periodically to discuss your career growth. Voice that you are aiming for a promotion. Show to him/her that you take your professional development seriously by discussing your goals and ways you can start taking on additional responsibilities. Try and start taking on the work of the role above yours. Keep a track record of your accomplishments and feedback (L&I has a free template FYI under Resources in my bio!).⠀
🌱 𝗟𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗝𝗼𝗯 𝗮𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗗𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝗻𝘆: Research the company and learn about their mission, corporate values, and their offerings. Take their available certifications if available to put on your resume. Reach out and build relationships over time with people that currently work there to understand the culture and to let them know you are interested in working for their company. Get your resume, cover letter and LinkedIn profile professionally reviewed. Tailor your resume and yes, even your cover letter for the job you ultimately apply for.
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Both of these scenarios 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚. But don't let that discourage you. What's something you're looking to accomplish in your career in the next 6 months? Don't delay - it's never too early to start preparing. Plant the seed now and watch yourself grow these next few months. Soon enough, after some hard work and patience, those 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 will come🌷💋
[𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗖𝗘: 𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗿 𝗗𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗖𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸-𝗜𝗻 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀𝗵𝗲𝗲𝘁] Let's chat career conversations with your manager 🤓
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How often are you having regular check-ins with your manager about your career development? At minimum, you should be meeting quarterly to review your performance and talk about your career progress. Don't wait until your annual performance review to do so! ❌ 𝙏𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙨 and put time on the calendar to meet periodically throughout the year 🗓
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Having these types of check-ins are essential to your professional success and it's important to go into them prepared with your own talking points. Enter the 𝘊𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘳 𝘋𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘊𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬-𝘐𝘯 worksheet ✔️This worksheet will help you to:⠀
➢ 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 your manager that you take your career seriously and are willing to put your best foot forward⠀
➢ 𝐑𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 on your goals and actions you're taking to get you to the next step in your career⠀
➢ 𝐂𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐞 a productive conversation with your manager to discuss your wins, challenges, and what you want to work on in the months ahead⠀
➢ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞 awareness to your work and a better opportunity to negotiate a promotion/raise/added benefits
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Interested? 😏 Download the FREE worksheet via the link in my bio under 𝚁𝚎𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚌𝚎𝚜 💋
I stand firmly by this career tip. Putting yoursel I stand firmly by this career tip. Putting yourself out there in the workplace and showcasing bits and pieces of who you are is critical to 𝙨𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙖𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙙.
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When I first started my professional career, I thought that I had to be a "version" of who I was at work. That I needed to always keep things "professional" and that it was "inappropriate" to talk about my personal life. 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝘄𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴.
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By intertwining my professional and personal brands into one, I've been able to 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱𝘴, 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺. Here are ways you can share more of who you are at work:⠀
✔ 𝐂𝐫𝐚𝐟𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐢𝐨: Whether it’s an internal-facing bio that's visible to your co-workers or the “About” section on your LinkedIn, take advantage of it! Go beyond just what you do for the company and talk about things you do outside of work and what you're passionate about.⠀
✔ 𝐄𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤: Those few minutes before a meeting begins are a great opportunity to get to know someone, ask questions, and share something about yourself.⠀
✔ 𝐓𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐨 𝐨𝐧: Zoom fatigue is real, but having your video on is a great way for someone to get to know you better beyond just your voice.⠀
✔ 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞: Even with many of us working from home, you can still show a bit of your personal style whether it's a crisp blazer, a statement jewelry piece, or your favorite shade of lipstick.⠀
✔ 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐝: Tap into the groups within your company that interest you as it will allow you to meet more likeminded people and talk about things other than work.
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Don't hold back in putting yourself out there and sharing more of who you are. 𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙚𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙩 𝙨𝙖𝙪𝙘𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙔-𝙊-𝙐💋
✨ 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙴 𝙾𝙽 𝙸𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚅𝙸𝙴𝚆 𝙵𝙴𝙰𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴 ✨  Meet Brittney.
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@bsoliver is a Nashville-based career and lifestyle freelance writer and content strategist. Over the past 3 years, Brittney has built her platform, @lemons_2_lemonade, to help young professionals turn their career obstacles around. Her platform is known for its networking mixers, which have brought over 2,000 professionals, entrepreneurs, and creatives together to turn life’s lemons into lemonade.
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I met Brittney at her Chicago mixer back in Fall 2019 and was so impressed with her story and what she was building with Lemons 2 Lemonade. I immediately signed up for her newsletter and followed her on all of her social channels, where we've been connecting ever since! We actually just wrapped up a #L2LChat of our own, where we chatted about the changing job landscape due to the pandemic.
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What inspires me about Brittney is that she balances working full-time and freelance writing for publishers like Fast Company and ESSENCE. She’s  a thought-leader, having keynoted LinkedIn's first women of color conference in 2019 and was listed as Forbe's "Nine Black Women Leaders Dedicated to Empowering Others." Not only that, Brittney has so much heart for what she does and never gives up on herself. That was apparent to me after hearing her story of going on 100 interviews in an 8-month period.
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In all sense of the word, Brittney is crushing any and all lemons she comes across. I can't wait to see how much more lemonade she makes this year. You can read our exclusive interview via the link in my bio!💋
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